A Reflection on Chapter 3...

Fialka, J. M., Mikus, K. C., & Feldman, A. K. (2012). Parents and Professionals Partnering for Children with Disabilities: A Dance that Matters. Corwin, A SAGE Publications Company.

    Getting behind in work, is always a challenge especially when your 5 month old is the reason.  My son has been under the weather for the last several days, and is just now getting back to feeling better.  That of course has put me behind in my classes. (Sorry Dr. Balderaz, I am trying the best I can.)  So as we begin to explore Chapter 3 of the reading, I am reminded about how parents, work and have lives outside of meetings.  I am also reminded that everyone needs to be a little more understanding on the roadblocks and obstacles we face in our everyday lives. 

    Being a parent for only 5 months, I have had to learn a great deal about young children.  Being a teacher has helped some, but a baptism by fire is the best description.  I really think that this experience has helped me understand a little more of what parents go through, especially when they want to help their child. 

    Chapter 3, provides a number of suggestions for both parents and professionals to help build a team that is able to provide the needed supports the child requires.  What this chapter provides is a set of guidelines each side should have when they are coming together with others to work on the issues the child and family face.   While many of these guidelines seem to be common sense, I have found that many times when people are scared, unsure, nervous, that a simple reminder of some of the guidelines are helpful to help keep the focus on the problem and the task.  It is also a good way for both parents and professionals to seek a common ground.  

    The first part of Chapter 3, deals with the guidelines that parents need when dealing with professionals, and the second part of Chapter 3 deals with the guidelines Professionals need when dealing with parents.   One important aspect of the relationship roles, is that I expect Professionals to be more understanding of the needs of parents than they seem to be portrayed.  What I mean by that statement is, that as a Teacher, I do a lot more "Dancing" than the parents do, with a variety of different partners.  I think that a seasoned teacher should be setting the example for other less experienced teachers.  For me, I was very fortunate that when I entered in to Special Education, I had a great group of ladies who were willing to help me as I got started and continue to this day to be a resource that I can draw upon. 

   (Page 97) Reflections, "As I review this list the three that caught my attention are"

1. Communicate
2. Read Carefully
3. Learn

The 3 guidelines I chose, are the ones, that I want the parents of my students to focus on.  I really think that each one of these components can help build a better relationship with the team as a whole and will also, prevent some uncomfortable meetings.   

     I would like to take take this one step further.  While each of those three elements I think are important, they are not the only elements that a parent should focus on.   I would encourage my parents to also to make documentation a habit.   I also would like parents to really ask questions about how to document. I would also like them to seek out information about what is going on with their child from some reputable sources.   I would also like to see parents show up to some of the workshops that the district puts on to help educate parents.  I want to see my parents more than once a year at an IEP meeting and I want to talk to them more than when there is a problem.  

(Page 100) How does the reframing of "in denial" impact your thinking about what families might experience?"

   I agree that the words "in denial" are poorly chosen.  I think the book is correct to point out that in disagreement is a better term to be used.  As I write this blog, I think of my former teachers, and their views of me when I was young student labeled as "Learning Disabled" well before I was diagnosed with Aspergers in college.  I also think of what my parents must have thought about what those professionals said and thought about my abilities.   I think that no one ever expected me to be an over achiever.  I certainly never had the grades my younger brother did.  To include college grades.  When I reflect on what I have accomplished in education and life I have shattered a lot of views of my abilities.  However it took a great deal of work on my part.   I think what both sides need to consider is what are realistic goals.  Early childhood intervention is a good thing.  I also think that we need to be setting goals that provide rigor and are challenging, but not impossible.   I also think that we need to also start to address transition early on.  I know that IDEA mandates that we address secondary transition by 16, however I am of the opinion that if you are waiting that long, you are not doing anyone any favors.  I think secondary transition should begin with the first IEP.   I also think that as the book states, that many of the goals should include input from the student.  As a student matures, and gets older, they should be not only informed of what is going on with their education, but they need to be team members who have a say in their outcome.  They are the one who are going to deal with the disability for the rest of their life, we need to be teaching them now how to make others "dance" with them.  

(page 103) "Name two other strategies you can use to promote partnerships."

1. Refrain from using Jargon.
2. Strive to learn about the parents as a person.

I think that we as professionals use Jargon to often with parents as we use it all the time with our peers and co-workers.  I think in many cases that can lead to a sense of making parents feel uneducated, and intimidates them.  I think that parents also are afraid to ask for explanations.   I think that when we prepare ourselves for meetings, we should be working from an outline of how to make the meeting progress.  (This is what I do in any meeting)  When I use an outline, I look at it like a script that I have things planned out, and it helps me avoid talking over the head of everyone in the meeting.   I also think that too many times, we as professionals don't try to learn about the parents.  I think the nature of being an overworked teacher with so many students on our case load makes this worse.  I also think that in some ways, parents also don't want to run into us either.  In the high school setting where I teach, I have very few parents come in for open  house, or parent teacher conferences.  Those parents that do come in, are the ones I have the best relationship with and are the ones, I really don't need to see.  I think that when we have IEP meeting, we need to set around some time to talk about something other than the meeting.  I think that will also help set the stage for a good open conversation and I think it will help put everyone at a more relaxed mood.

(Page 106)  "What strikes you as important to remember when meetings are beginning?"

I think all the suggestions in the book are good ideas, but I will admit I won't use all of them.  I will tailor my meetings to the dynamics of the group, and the relationship I have with the parents.   If I were to pick one of the suggestions as being the one I would concentrate on the most, it would be to create an environment that is welcoming to the parents and their child.  I think that will do more to set a good tone for the meeting than anything else.   I think that this is best done, with my approach of using an outline of the meeting. (This is also good, so I don't forget anything during the meeting if we get a bit side tracked.)  

(Page 108) "One thing I want to remember about beginning and ending meetings is."

From the reading it would be to encourage parents to follow up with any questions concerns after the meeting.   One thing I did not see in the book that I think should be is for professionals to be respectful of the time parents spend in meetings.  We are paid to be at the meetings they are not.  In many cases, parents have to take off work, to attend meetings.  That is why, when we plan meetings, we need to be accommodating to parents schedule, but we also need to make sure that all of the people who need to be at the meeting are at the meeting. 

AUTHORS NOTE TO READERS:
The posts in this series are for credit in my Masters Program at the University of Texas of the Permian Basin.

A Reflection on Reading, Chapter 2

Fialka, J. M., Mikus, K. C., & Feldman, A. K. (2012). Parents and Professionals Partnering for Children with Disabilities: A Dance that Matters. Corwin, A SAGE Publications Company.

      Continuing in my series on Children with Disabilities: A Dance that Matters,  I am going to reflect on Chapter 2.  While chapter 1 one offers a look at a dance and how people interact, Chapter 2 is like a play.  I get the sense the author wants the reader to see each interaction between the parents and the professional as independent scenes of an ongoing production.

  Reading through Chapter 2, I begin to see that each side shares a lot of the same concerns and apprehensions.  Each trying to hide from the other what is going on, as to avoid showing fear or weakness.  From the parents perspective, they not only have to put on a brave face for the professional but also their child whom they have a deep amount of concerns for. This adds a great deal of stress from the self-doubt that the parents have because of the lack understanding and inability to help their child without going to a professional.   For the professional, the brave face is to reinforce to outsiders that they are knowledgeable in the area.  The professional also has a great deal of fear, because they want to be sensitive to the needs of the family but this is after all an awkward time for them.    The ideas portion after each scene is great as it really puts into perspective what is going on.  In many ways, these are really rules or guidelines that should be in place but not really taught.  I would venture to say, that one of the downfalls of our society being so digital today, is that we are losing our abilities to interact with each other on a personal basis.  We are losing our understanding of how to communicate our needs and build that personal relationship with a service provider.   Below are my reflections to the two case studies presented in Chapter 2.

My Reflection on Sam. "As you read the Story of Sam, What feelings did you experience? What do you hope to remember and use as you build a partnership?"
     I think one of the issues that we face as professionals in education is that when we address parents in the role of parents we take time to digest and review the data we collect before we discuss what that data with the parents.   This is something that parents can find very frustrating.  I can understand why.  If we take our child to the Dr. because of medical issue, we start working on a treatment immediately.  If our child gets a surgery, we wait for the Dr. to come out and talk to us about that surgery and how it went. Something is done immediately.  We aren't left to wait and wonder the results.  I think that the challenge here for many is between physical issues that we can see, and neurological issues we cannot.  What I hope to remember is how to open up a dialogue with parents that treats them as a partner in their son's education.

My Reflection on Rachel. "As you read the Story of Rachel, What feelings did you experience? What do you hope to remember and use as you build a partnership?"
 Unlike Sam, Rachel's parents are familiar with the school and the people working in it.  I think that you also have a situation here where the parents have dealt with issues of being parents before and are more seasoned to address the issues they are facing.   I feel for the parents in both the cases of Sam and Rachel, as it is heartbreaking for any parent to deal with these issues.  I think in this case, the parents are wanting to make sure that their daughter gets the best services in the least restrictive environment.  I also think that they want to protect her from the negative aspects of being labeled as being a special needs student, as that term holds a stigma that can stigmatize young people among their peers, and the peers of their siblings.   What I hope to remember from this case, is that we are not just dealing with the individual, but we need to address the concerns of the entire family.

AUTHORS NOTE TO READERS:
The posts in this series are for credit in my Masters Program at the University of Texas of the Permian Basin.

A Reflection on Reading, Chapter 1

Fialka, J. M., Mikus, K. C., & Feldman, A. K. (2012). Parents and Professionals Partnering for Children with Disabilities: A Dance that Matters. Corwin, A SAGE Publications Company.

Over the course of my career as an educator, I have had many experiences working with parents. Many of my experiences have been very positive. Unfortunately more than a few have not been as I had hoped. As part of an assignment for a graduate class, I was tasked to read Parents and Professionals Partnering for Children with Disabilities: A Dance that Matters.
     Reading through the first chapter, I was able to get a sense that the authors have many of the same experiences in dealing with parents that I have. It is clear from the onset of the book that the the book is designed to help foster a working relationship between teachers and parents. It does this by explaining the various roles of people at a meeting, and the function of each. It also uses a variety of case studies as demonstrations on how it is easy for people to get off on the wrong foot, and some ideas on how people can salvage a relationship that is heading the wrong way.
I was not surprised that some of what was discussed was covered in a different way than I had seen them before. For example, the book uses a three phase approach to the relationships. The approach seems very similar to the Tuckman's stages of group development that was introduced in the 1960's. The three phase are Phase 1: Colliding and Campaigning, Phase 2: Cooperating and Compromising, and Phase 3: Creative Partnering and Collaborating. Each one of these phases relates specifically to meetings held at a school setting as apposed to Tuckman's stages which I think are more of a generalized group dynamics.
     What I think was the most interesting portion of chapter one, was the case studies as examples. While these case studies are used to highlight disagreements that team members might face in an Individual Education Program (IEP) meeting, it also shows me as a professional that I am not the only person who has had these same issues. More importantly, are how the case studies are used to show some techniques to help create a stronger sense of direction between team members.
      Some of the key points I was able to take from the book are:
"Opinions on solutions, interventions, or next steps are fiercely held, and the ideas or approaches of the other may seem unfamiliar or contradictory... the behaviors seem negative and difficult such campaigning is actually a positive reflection of the partners' strength of commitment to the child or the program." (13)
"As trust emerges, so does a spirit of cooperation."(20)
"Teams never out grow their need to listen to each other." (33)
While there are number of other key points that are talked about, these are the ones that I took to heart. I think mainly because of my own interactions with parent in the past, and different ways I have tried to build relationships with them.
     Lastly, I wanted to also comment on transition, which I found to not be specifically addressed by the authors, but is present in the case studies. When we as teachers receive a student on to our case load, it takes a great deal of time for us to learn about that student. Parents also have similar apprehensions about the change in the case manager and the new challenges their child is going to face in the very near future. I teach in a High School, and short of some time as a substitute teacher, my teaching experience is confined to the secondary education. At the high school, we deal with transition in a number of ways. Primarily we are looking at post secondary outcomes. While this is an important part of the IEP, it isn't always the whole part. I was able to see some of the positive aspects of having portions of the IEP meeting run by the student as described in the book as part of the section on Phase 3. I think having students part of the IEP meeting is an important part of teaching the child to be an advocate, and to help them understand the parts of the IEP and how they suppose to help. Specifically in this case study, a presentation was used to introduce a new student to the new IEP team and school. Upon further reflection of this, I think that we as educators should do more vertical integration between school with regard to transition.
     So far, I really like the book and the way it is presents the information. I think that this book would have helped me a great deal more when I entered Special Education as a teacher because many of the topics discussed so far I suffered through learning. No doubt several parents that I worked with were suffering right a long with me.
   
Now for the Reflections:
(page 9) What can be done or said to ease the awkwardness, ambivalence, or initial uncertainty?
I think the first step is to start a relationship with parents that does not revolve around a high stress event such a discipline mater.  I think it is important for teachers and parents to be able to meet each other on a level playing field. The classroom is a great place, but it provides the teacher with a lot of home field advantage.  Perhaps, a neutral location would be a great place to start, and have the meeting be informal.

(page 11) "If I remember only one thing from my reading about the parent-professional partnership and the dance metaphor, it is:" that the expectations of each partner is going to vary based on experience.  Teachers who have been teaching a while will view things differently than a new teacher.  The same is true for parents. Parents are the product of their initial experience with teachers.

(Page 12)"What can professionals and parents do and say to acknowledge and ease some of the awkwardness of these initial meetings?"

Check the ego at the door.  I think of late we have parents who are very much helicopters and feel to be a good parent they have to fight for the child no matter what. I also think that teachers tend to place themselves as the expert with regard to learning.  I think the best way to combat this is to acknowledge it is the Child we are wanting to be successful, and the conversation should start with what are we wanting to accomplish.  What are the goals for the child.

(Page 14)" Think about a time in your own personal life when you felt strongly about a situation.  Describe the circumstance. What did you want to have happen?  What was the underlying that desire -- what values, dreams, past history, and expectations? What did you want the other person to understand about your perspective?"

In my personal life, dealing with my mother as her care taker was one area where I felt very strong about the situation.  I was challenged with the role of being her care-taker and advocate. Unfortunately, my mother, suffered from powdered-butt syndrome, and did not listen to anything I said.  My goal was to get her the best medical care, and work with her to overcome her challenges.  Unfortunately, because of the way our system of health care is setup.  It was difficult to advocate for my mothers best interests because of her situation.  I wanted the Doctors to understand her medical needs.  I think that in my particular case, I was able to find some medical professionals who let me speak, and took what I said under advisement.  At first, they did not act upon my request, but over the course of some time, they eventually realized that my information was more valuable to them, and they later supported me.

(Page 17) "Describe three feelings that the parents are experiencing and three feelings that the professionals are experience.  Identity some of  the interests and values influencing or shaping the two different opinions about where Josie should be next year- from both the parent's and the professionals;s perspective. "

I think in the case study, that the parents and professionals are experiencing some of the same emotions.
Fear, anxiety, uncertainty.  What I think the underlying issue here, is that the parents in this case, want their child to receive the same opportunities as all other children. This is shown directly when the father says that keeping his daughter in another class is segregation.  There experience with education is limited at this point to their own experiences and that of the older children.  They also are showing that they have had a good relationship with another teacher and feel that that relationship has been successful for them in the past. I think in this case, that I would have asked the parents if we could have another meeting and invite both teachers to the meeting, to see what we can come up with.

(Page 19) "Now that you've reviewed the list of possible next dance steps take 10 minutes and write a dialogue - a conversation between the parent and the school psychologist.  Free write what each might say.   "

(SP)  What are areas of need that you see for you child?
(P)    I want my child to be successful in school and learn like the other children.
(SP)  Tell me how do you measure success?
(P)    Good grades.
(SP)   When you say "learn like other children?"  what do you mean by that?
(P)    I want my child to not be separated out from the other kids.  I want her to have the same experiences our other kids have had.
(SP)  How would you like the school and teachers to achive this goal?
(P)   I do not know.
(SP)  PE Class with other students?
(P)  Yes
(SP) Same lunch period as other students?
(P)  Yes
(SP) Same curriculum as the other students?
(P) Yes
(SP)   What accommodations do you think would best benefit your child?

After this question, now we are not talking about what needs to be done, we have moved to what the parents are willing to do.  That makes it easier for the professional to make suggestions and give the parents some say on what is going on.

(page 20) "If I remember on one thing from my reading about the phase of "Colliding and Campaigning": it is:"  That parents and educators are both advocates for the child.

(Page 26) "If I remember only one thing from my reading avout Cooperating and Compromising, it is:" Parents and teachers working together, make life a lot easier on both.

(page 33) "If I remember only one thing from my reading about Creative Partnering and Collaborating it is:" Teams never outgrow the need to listen to one another.

     One last note, I wanted to include a link to some great transition information, and IEP help.
Dr. Amber McConnell works at the University of Oklahoma. She has published a IEP script to help educators and parents integrate student participation in IEP's. Here is a link to that. http://ambermcconnellphd.com/iep-script/

Get Out! Explore!

     Not too long ago, my wife and I went exploring on the island of Saipan.  The island separates the Philippine sea and the Pacific ocean.  This island along with its neighbor Tinian played a significant role in the history of the United States during World War II.
    I like many people from the mainland, knew very little about Saipan until my wife and I arrived here in August.  As my wife will tell you, I love history, and the island of Saipan doesn't disappoint.
      One of our first adventures on the island was to the German Bunker.  What I know about this structure can be summed up with two words, Not Much.  However, one of my fellow teachers, knows a great deal about the history of the island and shared with me a lot about this place. I might add it is fascinating. One of the great lessons in education is that people are drawn to what interest them.  It is no surprise that what I have found here to be fascinating to me. Though my wife humors me about some of our explorations of the island thus far, she is very much interested in the local beaches, and the vast amounts of fresh seafood that island life offers.
     As a teacher, I spend time teaching my students what they need to know, not just for the exams, and the class, but for what they need to know in life. I want all of my students to appreciate the opportunity they have to receive an education. Most importantly I want them the appreciate where they live and the rich history that makes up the community.

    In my last blog post, I wrote about the importance of teachers, and adults being part of the community and to find ways to give back to the community.  I encourage you to go and read that blog post.  Today, I want to encourage everyone to learn the local history of where they live. As the old saying goes, "Home is where you hang your hat."  It is important that you know about the history of the area you live.  I suspect this is why so many state legislatures mandate state history for high school students.  Rather than a mandate, maybe it is time that we adults take a moment, and to explore the history around us, and to create some excitement in our young people about the area they live in.  I cannot think of one place that I have spent the night, that did not have some interesting history. A history that helped tell a story of our nation and of the world.

    There are a number of options to learn about the local history.  Museums, parks, monuments, and books are a great way to dive into the local history.  One of the more fun ways to dive into the history is something that my wife enjoys, Festivals.  She loves most Festivals that we have attended, though she makes a point of demanding we stay clear of any festival that talks about Rattlesnakes. I of course comply with her demands on this point.
     One other way you can get out and start learning about history is to explore the ruins you find.  Having spent some time here on the island, my wife and did explore the ruins of the old German Bunker.   In fact the photos on this post are of the structure.  In many ways, the exploration of an area like this will help our children and teens make a personal connection to the history and to the area.  These memories will help to foster a understanding that the places they learn about in school, are real places, not so far away.  Much like the field trips of the elementary school days, these types of adventures can and do serve a great way to connect what is learned in the classroom with the world around us.

    If you have the opportunity to get and explore the local area, DO IT!  Many times, even if it is a tourist spot, we neglect to visit the areas, that are important to the local history.  I know for sure that many of the side trips that my wife and I have made, certainly had a great impact on us both.  The local people who are around, are also a great source for learning about what happened in the area.  They also tell the best stories, and are very willing to guide you in your efforts to explore. Get out and explore!

Outside of Work...

       The saying goes "All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy."  This is true for all kids.  We are reminded at report card time that grades are an important part of academics.  We encourage our kids to study more, and get good grades.  Which is great!  I say keep it up. Good grades are important. Grades and the classroom are not the only place where education happens.  In fact many times the important social education that we want our children to get happens on the playground and on the sports teams they participate in.  Sometimes though we forget about some outside organizations that also provide the much needed social education.  Here I am talking about groups like the Boy Scouts, Girls Scouts, or 4-H.

     For many people 4-H is seen as being for younger kids, while FFA is seen being for older kids.  This is not true.  4-H offers the same opportunities to all kids not just younger ones.  In many ways, the two programs will complement each other.  I will also tell you that as an adult leader, I helped our Extension educator with her other projects, such as the 7 mile Bicycle Ride through the Wichita Mountains in southwest Oklahoma.

      4-H is one of the organizations that I participated in during High School.  That led me to later be an adult leader. As my friends will tell you, I wasn't anti-social in high school, but I was socially awkward.  My mother insisted that I participate in something outside of school.  As I had an interest in marksmanship and hunting, I participated during high school in the 4-H Shooting Sports program.  In 4-H you learn by doing.  I simply did not learn from a class, or book.  I was expected to go out and participate with the group.  I was very fortunate to have a wonderful coach, Marie Ketchum, who taught me a number of things besides Trap & Skeet.  I learned how to interact with both adults and peers in a social environment.  I learned a great deal how to talk to people in many different ways.  I learned how to accept criticism without taking it personally.  I also learned how recover from failure without it ruining my entire day. Trust me if you only break one clay out of 25 you will have a lot of self doubt.  Most importantly, I learned that every person you meet can teach you something if you are willing to learn.


   For me Shooting Sports was how I participated in 4-H but it is not the only way to participate.  I encourage everyone to seek the local Agricultural Extension office and find out the 4-H program in your area.  If you are part of the military, Contact your local MWR office for the different 4-H opportunities that are available in your community.

     Organizations like 4-H are another way that teachers and parents can work together to build a community based on a shared interest. I encourage not only parents to get involved but also teachers.  I enjoyed working with other 4-H volunteers from around Oklahoma.  Our common interests in student enrichment made for a great time, and for a lot of learning all the way around.

     If you take nothing else from this article, take away that it is in everyone's interest to get involved.  There are lots of young people in your community will have interests in something that you have an interest in. If you nurture that interest in the young people of your community, you help the community improve.